When the love bug hits, there is no stopping it. So in my limited experience with my oldest 2 daughters the "boyfriend" thing starts to really take shape in Middle School. I mean one of my girls got a ring for a Christmas present in 8th grade. A little kooky...and thankfully she thought the same thing and broke things off with the boy and his mother (another story) shortly after Christmas. Shew! But by freshman year in High School the dating, boyfriend drama is in full swing! Blekk! It's brutal, but a right of passage.
So, it seems like the average age to be allowed to car date - alone - 1 on 1 is the ripe old age of 16. Sweet 16. Seems like if they are dating the "Sweet 16" thing may be an oxymoron. That's just my opinion. So what I wonder is why we feel like going from 15 to 16 in one day makes for a great decision maker? Why when a girl turns 16 do we say it's OK to date. I should by the way bring myself up to date and use the correct terminology. We let them "hook-up". Which I'm told doesn't always mean sex. I guess hooking up can mean anything from 1st base to a grand slam. UGH!
We have 2 1/2 teenage girls. The older 2 have both had at least one serious boyfriend. Which on some levels I am glad. I mean you have to have some practice and start learning what you don't want to spend the rest of your life with, right? So it's pretty normal for a girl to date in high school. It's also pretty normal to have at least one serious boyfriend by the time a person is 18. I guess my question is this. My daughters (bless their hearts) are NOT any different than I was at 16. I was stupid. I was a bad decision maker, and lucky that I didn't end up "in a family way". So sad to say but it's true.
Let's cut to the chase. Dating leads to sex. Sex at 16 is not a great path. Emotionally and mentally it's a recipe for disaster. I mean really speaking from personal experience during my own teen years, and those of my girls so far, not much has changed. Girls want to be loved and cherished by a boy. Doesn't matter if you think you are the one set of parents raising an independent girl...you aren't-girls want love. Boys on the other hand have one mission. To have sex with our daughters. It's true. My girls have asked us several times why we don't like any of the boys they bring home. Each time I give the same answer. It's hard to look into the eyes of the enemy and be nice. I mean his goal is to have sex with my beautiful little girl--my job is to foil all attempts. Basically I guess what I'm saying is why set them up for heartache at 16? Why is that the age that seems appropriate? Are we just saying 16 because that's the age that we were able to date?
Let me know what you think.
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